Ball-Gaggings

Oh boy am I slacking with this blog. Which is funny because this semester is the semester I probably have the most to write about.

My initial panic has worn off a bit, though it has the occasional flare-up, usually Monday nights into Tuesdays. I have developed a system of studying that has helped so far. (Thank god for my anal-retentive need to save EVERYTHING from my classes--I seriously would be sitting fetal in a corner drooling on myself and chewing off pieces of my skin were it not for this fact.) I just fear that I'm not necessarily going to be able to keep things tied-up and ball-gagged in my brain long enough that I'll still be able to whip the shit out of them four months from now when I'm taking the state board exam. But good god, here's to hoping.

This semester feels like one of the most overwhelming semesters I've had in the entirety of all my schooling. I am just astounded when I remind myself occasionally that, well, all I really need to know for the state board exam is EVERY SINGLE THING ABOUT HOW THE BODY WORKS AND WHAT EVERYTHING IN THE HUMAN BODY IS CALLED. Seriously: that's what it comes down to. You need to know everything, on the OFF chance that one little tiny tidbit of information on, say, the scientific name for your cuticle (which is "eponychium") shows up on the exam. And that actually did one year, if you can believe it.

I must admit though, there is a certain magic in looking back over all that you've learned and finally being able make the connections, as silly as they may seem. The other day I had the dumbest realization ever: Everything in the body has a cell in it, and all the cell parts are pretty similar, just with slightly different names. EPIPHANY. My brain likes this side of things because it's able to group things and find patterns, and for some reason that pleases it.

Unfortunately, next week marks the start of the muscles again, which are my downfall.

I hate muscles, with their stupid beginnings and endings and things they do and nerves that make them work. Pah.

Fuck muscles.

I also realized yesterday that in just a couple more weeks (St. Patty's Day, to be exact), we have our midterm. And that is scary as all get-out.

That also means that as of this week, I'm 1/3 of the way through my last semester. And that is just crazy ass crazy.

Also scary is the fact that, as I've mentioned before, there are only two people in my Massage Review class, one of which is Yours Truly. And twice now, my classmate has not shown up. Which means that it's just me. And Scrub Nazi. Staring at each other. Which also is a bit harrowing because, for example, yesterday, he spent the three hours just drilling "the class" with questions. But when "the class" consists of one person, you don't have much buffer in the way of averting your eyes or flipping through your notebook distractedly while hoping and praying that someone else knows the answer and will speak up before he calls on you.

Even worse is when he precedes the question with "Well, THIS one is SUPER-easy." Translated, this of course means your brain will immediately evacuate its knowledge-bowels of any and all information, so you will end up guessing every answer but the correct one. Without a doubt.